Lately, I’ve been revisiting some of Malcolm Gladwell’s work. Like Gladwell, I’m fascinated by the intersection of science and social behavior, especially now that I’m a full-time coach.
I recently read Gladwell's What the Dog Saw and was particularly struck by a concept he explores in The New-Boy Network chapter. In essence, how someone behaves on a given day has more to do with situational context than with fixed personality traits or natural strengths. That’s why someone who seems confident, articulate, and insightful in an interview might later struggle with disengagement or self-doubt once they’re in the role.
It’s fascinating how dramatically behavior can shift based on the situation. This isn’t exactly new information, but reflecting on it has made me think differently about how we approach job responsibilities, performance reviews, and professional development. We tend to choose careers based on our interests or natural strengths. But as our responsibilities evolve—especially as we step into more senior or complex roles—we have to adapt how we behave in order to meet those new expectations.
That doesn’t always require developing brand-new skills. Often, we already demonstrate those behaviors in other areas of our lives. The opportunity is to identify where they naturally emerge, understand why they show up there, and intentionally channel them into the settings that demand them most.
I’ve written before about situational confidence, and this is an extension of that idea. At its core, it’s about this question:
How do you intentionally channel the behavior you want to exhibit when and where it matters most?
And for those of us who lead others:
How do you help others bring their best traits and habits to the situations that require them?
This is where coaching comes in. It starts with awareness and leads to intentional change. You can coach yourself or your team through a simple process like this:
Start by examining how you naturally respond in recurring scenarios. What patterns do you notice? For instance, maybe a team leader regularly accepts B-level work from their team. The result: a group that meets expectations but rarely exceeds them, and doesn’t stretch, grow, or perform as more than the sum of its parts.
Where in their life do they hold others to a higher standard? Maybe at home, they expect their child to follow through on academic or behavioral responsibilities. In that setting, they coach consistently, reinforce expectations, and adjust their approach based on what motivates the child, whether through encouragement or consequences.
Why are they more consistent or engaged in that setting? Maybe it’s a strong sense of responsibility, a fear of wasted potential, or a desire to ease the burden on others. Understanding the why reveals what’s fueling that behavior, and it may be the key to unlocking it elsewhere.
How can that same motivation be applied at work? What would shift if they brought the same level of care and accountability to their team, and how would it benefit the business, the culture, and their own leadership?
Think of this process as a cousin to the growth mindset. You don't have to acquire entirely new skills. Instead, you can identify where more effective behaviors already exist, and retrain your brain to apply them more deliberately in a different context.
The behavior you need may already be in you. The question is how to harness and use it where it matters most.